tittie minor

aliens exist. jake is proof. he likes elissa del stairo. i know that may sound rude, but its true. you might be looking at this and saying, "whoa, he sux" but you shouldnt because he is really cool. hes like the avatar (the last airbender one).
JAKE VANKOMEN INTERVIEW

Sam: Whats your favorite color?

Jake: Reddish Greenish Christmasy.

Sam: Whats your favorite animal?

Jake: Cheetah. Baboon. Cat.

Sam: I've heard that you're quite the inventor. Can you tell me a little bit about some of your ideas?

Jake: Well I invented the 1999 Plasma Ray that shoots to the 14th dimension. Oh yeah, and I invented solar powered heated sleeping bags.

Sam: I like your haircut. Can you tell me a little about that?

Jake: Ummm, Duhhh. Its fun-knee. Its a MOHAWK.

Nolan: If you had a big jar of precut pickles, how many do you think you could eat in one sitting?

Jake: 47. I could probably eat 47.

Josh: Had did you get the nickname "fag"

Jake: Josh gave it to me. HES a fag.

Nolan: Okay. when you start playing pokemon red version, which pokemon do you start with? And what beverage do you prefer while you play?

Jake: Charmander. Cause he's cool. I like charmander. I like Full Throttles. and No Fear because it describes my lifestyle.

Nolan: Which wheel do you prefer: Element with the square, or Flip sidecuts?

Jake: Flip Sidecuts.

Josh: if you were a dog what kind of dog would you be?

Jake: Weiner dog.

Josh: Whats your opinion on abortion?

Jake: Its right.

Josh: How many abortions has your sister had?

Jake: one.

Thank yous?
Jake: I would like to thank people. My mom, XBOX360, TV, candy/soda, taco del mar, teriyaki, rob, kramer not the seinfeld one. and miles. MILES

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